My name is Aeryn and I live in Manchester, UK.
I call myself an artist, and writer. Creating is what I love to do. And photography is my main passion for expression. I love writing, painting, poetry, all sorts of things. I just like to dabble, experiment and play.
I’ve even exhibited some of my art works and photography in the past.
I’m from the South of England but have lived in the North for more than half my life, and it’s my home. I have two kids in their teens and they are wonderful people. I’m so excited to be with them and watch them grow.
I’m a bit of a loner and I experience life in my own way. I never really felt like I fit in. And I never understood why. But in recent years have come to accept that I have trauma and am on some kind of Spectrum. And this might be why. 10 years ago I wasn’t even aware of this. I was calling it mental illnes back then (which it is, but this term does not do it justice). I have various diagnoses. The doctors don’t seem to be able to decide what’s going on with me. They want me to test for Autism next.
I use the pronouns she/her. I’m trans. And gay. Whatever that means. I don’t really talk about it too much, but it’s always worth mentioning. I’m not into activism, or pushing my identity. It is what it is and it’s been one of my biggest challenges in life.
In my mid-forties, 2016 to 2018, I had a profound spiritual awakening, and also a severe psychotic breakdown. It was really a terrifying time, but also very beautiful. I became quite disabled for a time and am still recovering.
I realised something else was going on here. I had been having unexplainable experiences my whole life. But this awakening was saying that healing was possible, and maybe I wasn’t actually crazy. Maybe it’s the world that is crazy. There have been a steady flow of breakdowns and rebirths, healing and expanding. And the intensity of 2022, and events in community brought forward another sharp reminder of my past traumas. Recent trauma too. I was gifted a very clear view of my own unbalanced spiritual practice. Ouch!!
It’s all been a huge learning curve, but learning what? I think just to love myself, really, is enough. I think could be that simple. Just to have compassion. To deprogram. To accept myself. To allow myself a chance to heal.
So although I love to express myself, it’s something that’s very intermittent, very inconsistent. But I’m learning that it’s ok to be like this. I’m learning to love myself. I’m learning what supports me best.
And I love share my journey through this too. Because I love following people who share their stories. I know how much it helps me, and I want to help others too. To tell my story feels like a calling. All the ugly, all the rainbows, the dark, and the light. To find out that it truly is ok to be exactly where I am in life, and share that with others.
In 2022, I took a look at how uncomfortable I feel with social media platforms. So I decided to revisit how I use them, and choose if want to continue or cancel any of my accounts.
But my focus also returned to my existing platforms. I realised I wanted to create a safe space to share my work. I already have a great publishing service, so why not use it?! It has no ads; is not out of my control; I’m not trying to second guess an algorithm, or compete with others; it’s open to the public internet and searchable; guarantees delivery of my work into inboxes (optionally, if readers want that); is something I can monetise easily in the future; looks good; works well; and has a good company ethic and ethos.
I decided to keep using my Instagram account @aerynnorth for my art and my blogging. I realised I can post my art in the posts, and my writings and other stuff in the stories. I’ll see how it goes.
You can read or listen to my story and thoughts on spiritual growth; healing; trauma; learning to love and look after myself here: northsoulstar.com.
Art By Aeryn
You can see my art, photography and creative stuff here: aeryn.art.
Both these platforms offer email newsletter subscriptions if anyone wants to follow that way. Or they can follow my Instagram and get most things through there. Or even subscribe to the RSS feed on this (aeryn.me) website.
Did you read all of this?! Gold star for you ⭐️
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